understand me

BECAUSE IM ASIAN, HAHA

hiaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa stupid fever stopped me from staying up late outside with the other people. i missed outdoor stay-up-lates. Look look, I can still hear those people's voices from here- aaahh its only 10.24pm !!

[ T_T,, ive been trying t lsten t music just t cover up their noises-which i couldn help t eavesdrop- but the music load suckss ]

... But yeah on the other side mi fever IS rising again. U kno ukno i ate kitkat which ochi gave me and it instantly gave me some head poisoning and i had t drink a hell load of water t ease the headache out. Waw u israeli companyy.

See see THIS isn mi whole point of writing this entry, but since im still warmed up from what happened just now and all I cant concentrate on mi main topic.
Lalalala, people came t mi house after school. I went t villagio first [so so i went t FFC.. then wen i came back home i prayed and all blah".. then i went t villagio] ,, and then i found indira en dasa at mi house. Not long later dhea came, then farah and, u kno, the order.
Blah" , we had singing practice, la la la la la , had some troubles with getting out of the house, blah blah blah then mi fever kinda got back on me again so i couldn play in freedom. and la la la in the end mi brother had to drag me into the house.









But that isn the point.
Ok so wat happened is.
I have realised.
How badly naive I em.
It sucks.

So so ,
u see u see,, mi dad isn someone who u can piss off easily.
It takes a series of misfortunate events t actually tick him off.
Damn, i ddn even realise how many times I did yesterday;
I was rele sickk on Tuesday rite?
On wednesday he was caring fr me, cz after school i kinda got sick again.
everytime he wanted t help me, i said no .
And i reject in a way that whatever he does dsn work
HAHA
At nite at abt 11 or sth
He brought me a heater along with the extension cable
Oh see I cant sleep with heaters on
They choke me, like, literally
hiaaaa so i told him no i dont need it
but he already turned it on
so i was like no no i'll be sweating which was an exaggeration
he sighed
then he was guna turn off the power from the cable stock,
i said no", that shudn be done, turn off the power from the heater first
he turned it off properly
then he went
then he closed th door in a way that he ddn rele do it fr th sake of me liking the door closed
i realised i hav pissed him off
O:

Then today at school
See",,
lily's most experienced in relationships rite?
I hav never experienced any tied relationship with boys
I never intended t hav any anyway
against the rules
But I saw han's photo today
and he lks rele cute on it O:
*ive frgotten how he lks NOW, but i rmember mi first impression
So i kept emphasising how cute he is
and said abt how she can like bag when she has han
[but no lily i dont think i said more than that, did i ? thats all i knew i was saying]
Turns out i went overboard
and she was sad on 2nd break
ckk
so so so
since i knew i was th reason she was being quiet because of me,
i asked saher abt it in art
i asked her, how to understand people
of course, she couldnt answer, i ddn expect one anyway, it was just mi question;
but she told me she can answer abt people's personality in the inside
That wasn too important- I know about people, I just dont kno how t react.
Then i told her
about how some people think that theyr rele close to me, but to me they arn. And u know what she answered? she told me she told me
that i am the kind of person shed expect t hav people like thatt
cz im rele open and honest and all
then i told her, how yeah,maybe i DO tell them sth of an incidentt, but then after that they think thats ALL i hav in mi life, mi life isn EMPTY u kno .
then she told me , yeahh ur rite , u shudn be too open to everyone- like her, she can only confess t rele close people, like me, and those other school prens.
I agreed to that- but u see the problem?
When u hav got used t sth, it becomes a part of u. In a way, thats the disadvantage (bcz see, it sometime hurts when that somebody laughs at you when ur in ur times of need instead of pitying you- which yeah,, happened) ,
but when u lk at the other side, I have a lot of friends to help me with things [cz seriously i always need someone t lean on,sorry] . And different people are reliable on different things. - _ - .. [dot dot dot]
so,, yeh, sorry lilyy hiahahha

-oh tanks fr th tips too saher i'll try t follow it HAHA